Better to have loved and lost?

or not to love at all.

That is a great question.

I may have lost in this most recent round, but am I sorry that I put myself out there? No, not one bit.  Am I sad that I have lost?  Yes, but I will pull through…  I will pull through quickly, not waiting on the sidelines of life for him to come back, or make up his mind, or pining away.

I would not trade the moments I had with him for anything.  He once said he wanted to ruin me for any other man, that he wanted to be the best and the only one that I wanted, little did he know he know he already was…  For I kept playing the game that is dating – teasing and tormenting and hinting he still had to win me over.  If I had done it differently would things still be the same?  I don’t know, and it doesn’t matter.

I chose to shield my heart from him as he tried to make me say what I felt.  He said and did things I didn’t understand, he got another girlfriend, or he didn’t I still do not truly know, but what I do know is that while I crave his attention, his texts, the sound of his voice, his smile, his touch and his kisses along with his cock, the reality of it is that I shall probably never get to see him again.

I know him, he will continue to text, to tease and to torment and I will do the same, but I now know that that is all it will be from now on.  I am not his priority, not where his heart lies, or his angel, just his slutty little play thing…

I always say love is for children, I should have followed my own advice.


5 Responses to “Better to have loved and lost?”

  1. Great read and very well written! I would rather have loved and lost. At least you’re trying to find love. I’m a big believer that even when you lose in relationships, you gain. You gain the experience of working in a relationship, traits that you like, don’t like, things you won’t put up and at the end of the day, they give you a better idea of who your ideal match is.

    I can relate to guarding my heart. Ever since breaking up with my fiancee, I have kept my heart closed off from all the girls I dated. While I was protecting myself from getting hurt, I was also preventing myself from finding a great woman. I think you have to make yourself vulnerable, put yourself out there no matter what the risks. I go through life not wanting to look back and say, I should have talked to that woman, asked her out and went for the kiss. I would rather love and learn(replacing lost).

  2. I completely agree with you. It’s the best feeling in the word to fall in love. It’s hurts to let go, but the memories and experiences that you have with that person are priceless!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: